Why? Because I failed at failing, consequently, I do not get oxygen to be able to travel. I had to reach Obama’s health plans number of 87 to 89 on the little finger meter. I could only get down to 90 even though after 6 minutes of walking two people were actually holding me up and I was gasping like the fish on the dock. I looked like one of those exhausted marathon runners whose body has gone spastic. Seriously, what does this mean in the real scheme of things in my life? No lunches out with a friend because I can’t walk without oxygen (numbers be damned) a distance of 10 feet. No hopping on a plane to go to a tatting conference. Only the wheel chair, which is cumbersome and difficult for my husband to lift in and out of the van. I’d love to hear the justification for this illusive number inspired by some mid-level functionary. What? I left the doctor with a headache, slightly light-headed and that horrible word, failed, hanging over my head. I never fail at anything, at least not totally.
Ah well, on to tatting. Those who’ve kept in contact, their number is few and SO appreciated, know that after several operations to open up a “good” vein for the dialysis I now have a vein and a graph. This ensured there wasn’t an 8th operation but it also went far beyond numbness and tingling; to #10 on the pain scale. It is called STELL; meaning that the graph and vein steal most of the blood from circulating to the hand. I keep wondering if it will turn black and fall off (JOKE). BUT it is necrosis. It is a block of wood and most of the day I can’t hold a fork, let alone a shuttle. That is the tatting update!
I have NOT given up! I find I can tat for 15 minute intervals, so I shall find projects that are quick, or that I can work on in spurts ~ like Jane’s TIAS. I’m going to TRY to finish the “Sheep” doily because my daughter really wants it finished. Have to find it first, packing has not proceeded as husband has not been doing well and has his hands full with laundry, home cleaning, and cooking. The arthritis is beginning to make his fingers curl up and so he is also challenged by old age.
Please do not think because I have shared this news that I’m downcast or feel hopeless. I do not. I enumerate my blessings. I’m in the beautiful tree-filled town I love, I can see my daughters with regularity and we have “girls” days where we have mani-pedis and lunch out, and I’m in a church where there are loving people and opportunities to serve the Lord from my home; and, able to attend the Wednesday Bible Study class from my wheel chair.
Just this past weekend, Kristen came to visit (it is a 45 minute drive from her home) and stayed from Thursday through Sunday afternoon. We had a lovely day getting our hair done by Holly at JANE, and a Googled East Indian eatery called BOMBAY. By the time I’d finished my small lunch and got myself back to the van I was done for the day...but it was a lovely morning.
RESOLUTION Loyal is going to rent little oxygen bottles that last 4 hours and I can use them for church and the girl-day outings; then, I’ll last a bit longer.
I am currently working on a book mark and I’ve decided the pattern is too involved for me to continue because just as I get to the difficult part, my hand goes useless and that is frustrating. These are techniques I HAD conquered but what I do has to be easy and quick.
So here I am and I promise to have something to show for my 15-minute tatting episodes the next time I blog. Good to be back and as my hand begins needle and pins pain, I bid you a fond adieu! Oh, I have a new, short hair style in Platinum that is easy to care for and reflects my undoubted persona. LOL